Weight Gain and Pictures!

5 pounds in 2 weeks...that is what they told me I had gained from May 28 to June 11. It did not surprise me too much as I could feel that the baby had grown a lot and my belly was a lot bigger. It had also been much harder for me to get up off of the couch or the bed. But, the good news was that I had only gained 11 pounds total in the pregnancy. On average, people gain about 10-14 pounds by the 21st week, so I was right on target and even on the lower end of it, which made me happy. I was so worried that being on bedrest so early would make me gain weight too fast. I really don't want to be unhealthy and add other risks to the ones I already have.

I know it won't last as the bigger the baby gets, the less I will be able to move. It has been hard enough to move as it is, I can't imagine what it will be a couple of weeks from now :) My muscles have caused most of the problem because they get so tight sometimes, it really does hurt to move sometimes. But, I've been trying to do some little stretches to help my muscles. Some days are better than others and I just kind of go day by day with it :)

I've had some tightening and I'm not sure if it is contractions or just the baby moving. I've also had a lot more back pain lately. Both tend to go away when I change positions and I have also been drinking a lot of water to help me stay hydrated. I have been told that as long as the symptoms go away and are not timable it is ok and normal. I have found an incompetant cervix bulletin board that has been really helpful to me in knowing what kinds of things other women in my situation are going through. It helps to see that they are having the same kinds of symptoms and are also being told it is normal.

I can't wait to make it through this week without any problems! This was another huge goal for me, since this is the week I first went into the hospital with Ethan. I am now at the point that every day means a lot to me. I hate the fact that I sometimes have to think about the fact that viability is only a few weeks away and I have to make it to that point and take a deep breath and make it to the next goal. I try to use imagery to help me and the image is a fat, healthy little boy coming home from the hospital with me! It helps me to think about that and helps me to see the long-term goals a little easier, especially when the short-term goals are so important right now!

The picture above is the three of us when I was almost 13 weeks pregnant (I look bigger than I was). It was at our last out of town trip until the baby is born. Matt was in his friend Joe's wedding and we were happy to be able to have that trip. The picture below is one Matt took this weekend at 21 weeks 4 days. I actually look that pregnant and I love it, I never saw that with Ethan's pregnancy. I thought some of you who have not seen me in nearly 2 months and some of you even more, would like to see what I look like and how things are progressing.

Happy Father's Day Part 2

Happy Father's Day! I made a couple of videos for all of you. I hope you like them!
Love, Ethan
P.S. They are just showing up black, but they do work, just press play!

Happy Father's Day!

As I think about Father's Day coming up, I think of two fathers in my life. The first father I think of is my own father. My dad is the kind of dad that would do anything for his daughters. He has five, so that is a lot to ask of him, but he does it. I think back to many times where all we ever had to do was ask and my dad was there for us. Whether it had to do with our houses, cars, yards, school work, or even our children, he is here for us. And my mom puts up with him doing all of these things for us, because she does the same thing, just in her own way. Recently my dad has really helped with taking Ethan back and forth to his house so that my mom can watch him for me. He also brings him back to me when he can so that Matt doesn't have to drive across town.

I know it gets frustrating for both of my parents having to pick up on the things with Ethan that I am unable to do, but I appreciate it a lot. But, as I said in an earlier post, parents do what they have to to make their kids happy. That's what my parents do.

The second father I think of is the father of my children. My wonderful husband Matt. I have said in a previous post all of the things he is sacrificing in order to help bring this baby into the world safely and he has continued to do that. He truly amazes me with all of the things that he has been doing for all of us. I know it has been incredibly hard on him, but I also know that he would not do anything to harm this baby, by making me pick up the slack.

Matt is also so great with Ethan, he does such a great job with him. Sometimes, all I can hear from upstairs is what sounds like thunder, because they are usually chasing each other, wrestling, playing hide-and-seek, etc. It cracks me up to hear them play. Today, they are spending the day together at the zoo. Matt is not in any way a back seat dad, he is right there doing as much as I am, if not more sometimes. I love that about him. I always hear about how some dads don't really help with taking care of their children, whether it is on tv, in the movies, or even people we know, but that is not Matt.

Ethan loves his dad so much. It was so funny because the other day, Ethan was Matt's shadow, he followed him around everywhere and was literally 2 steps, sometimes one, behind him at all times. He is always concerned about where Matt is and what he is doing. I know this has come from the fact that Ethan knows he can trust his dad to always be there for him. I know that Matt will continue to be a great dad to our second son, he already has been.

I could not ask for a better father for my children, I also couldn't ask for a better dad for me.

The picture is from the Mud Hens game that Matt and Ethan went to Memorial Day weekend.

It's a....

Well, you'll have to keep reading to find out!!!! The appointment went very well today! We were very excited to go because of the ultrasound. I had a lot of questions during the ultrasound, just to make sure things were going well. The first time I went into labor with Ethan was about a week and a half from now, so I had a lot of questions about that. We decided to take Ethan, which was interesting because he refused to take a nap today, but he still had fun looking at what was happening.

She went through all of the normal measurements and such and had asked us if we wanted to know what it was and we both said yes! After awhile, I saw a picture between the legs that made me think it was a boy. Then she finally zoomed in to let us see, and even though most of you thought we were having a girl, she told us it's a boy!!! We were both pretty happy about it, we would have either way, but we were happy that Ethan will have a little brother to play with.

They did not do a 3D ultrasound, but we did get a couple of good pictures of his face. The one below is straight on of his face. His face is right in the middle and you can see his body below that.

We also got a pretty good semi-profile picture.

After all of the measurements, the baby was actually measuring 22 weeks and 2 days. I am only 21 weeks and 1 day, so that actually puts the baby a little bigger, which right now is normal, but good. We know exactly when I got pregnant because I wanted to be precise on dates for my bedrest to fall mostly in the summer, of course that didn't matter anyway, but we know I'm still actually 21 weeks. So we'll see how the baby continues to grow, but as of now they said he looks great and looks healthy and that is all we care about. We just want a healthy baby.

My placenta is on top again, it was with Ethan also. But, the technician said that it is not near the cervix, it is actually up high, which is really good. That takes away another risk for this pregnancy, at least for now and hopefully the rest of the pregnancy. The doctor told us that he wants me to get at least another 7 weeks in and I told him I want to at least get 10 weeks and he said that would be wonderful! I got the idea that he really doesn't think I'll go full-term, but he wants me to prove him wrong, which I am ready to do. I've done this for 7 weeks, I can do another 7 or more!

All in all we had another great appointment and we couldn't be happier. We are very excited to add another boy to our family, that makes 8 boys and 3 girls for my parents! I guess it will just have to be me, the dog and our cats as the only females in the house! Now, I understand how my dad feels having only the dogs as the other males in a house of 6 females. And Matt has taken after his dad in producing only boys! His dad had 5 boys, while my dad had 5 girls!

As for a name, no, we don't have one. We have a list going and now that we know it is a boy, we will work to come up with some combinations that we like. But, you will have to wait until the baby is born to know his name, even if we would decide beforehand. We would actually like to have a couple of names ready and then name him when we see him, but we'll see.

We'll keep you updated, especially as the next week or so progresses and we get closer to 22 1/2 weeks.

And the clock struck midnight...

Friday night, the night of the storms...or in some places no storm. Matt, Ethan and I were going about our normal Friday night. We had started to watch a movie and Ethan was completely hyper, running around and talking very loudly. So, the movie got put to rest until later (it was a vod movie). We all started doing other things, well, ok, Ethan continued to be very hyper :) Then my mom called and asked if we had a place to go and I asked what she was talking about and she told us of the severe storms and tornado watches. So, we switched the channel and within moments heard the sirens going off. Matt went out and took care of our hanging plants so that they would not blow over and he took the umbrella off of our table for the same reason. In that few minutes the winds picked up significantly and the sky completely darkened. So, we continued to watch the news and Matt stepped outside to take a look at the sky, since the clouds were so ominous looking.

Ethan was all concerned about daddy being outside and then he told me that grandpa must be scared of the "funder". Which, obviously meant he was afraid, but he needed a buddy to be scared with him and it was clear mommy and daddy were not scared. When Matt came in, Ethan told him not to go outside, which was probably good because that is about the time it started to rain. So, we waited and watch for this severe weather to come through, and it lasted just a few minutes before it was gone and done. Our electricity had gone down once when the AC came on, but that was it and we thought we were good to go...we thought.

It was about 10:30 before we were able to put Ethan to bed. We didn't want him upstairs in case something more severe would happen. Matt and I then chose to wait to watch the movie until Saturday (which never happened) because I was already having problems understanding what the movie was even about and now it was about 2 hours later and I was a lot more tired. I had actually asked Matt, "is it bad that I have no clue what is happening in this movie?" It was about a half hour in, ok, give me a little credit, I have been on bedrest for nearly 7 weeks, my brain is turning into mush!

Eventually, both of us went to bed to read and watch some tv. It was about midnight when Matt heard through the open windows upstairs what sounded like sizzling fireworks. I was still watching tv and just settling in to go to sleep. Then all of a sudden there was a huge booming sound and then it was pitch black. I heard Matt upstairs so I called to him and asked him what he thought it was and we determined that it must have been a transformer that blew. Of course, without lights it was nearly impossible to find flashlights. Matt had received a Maglight for Christmas, so he started looking for it and could not remember where it was. I looked out the window to see if others were out and the street lights and everyone across the street had their lights on. Matt saw the people behind us flashing a flashlight into the trees looking to see what happened, since it sounded like it was right outside our house.

Matt found the light and then some other smaller flashlights. We made the call to the electric company, which was of course automated and no help. Then, we decided to just go to sleep and hope it came back on in the night or early morning. Whenever we have lost electricity in the 9 years we have been married, we have gotten it back within a short amount of time, so we didn't expect anything different this time.

Morning came at a little after 6 am when a little tiny voice said "mama, I want to eat". It turns out that none of us had a good night of sleep. Ethan didn't have his "vent" or as we know it AC or his "ainjoe light" aka angel nightlight, two things he has grown to "need" in order to sleep at night. Matt, ended up with Ethan hogging the bed and making things very hot. I did not have my CPAP machine, so I was up a lot as I used to be. Which all adds up to less than 6 hours of sleep.

Everything was still out and stayed out. Matt called and they said we may not get it back until Sunday afternoon or evening. Now, plans had to be made. Ethan and I could not stay without AC and we were close to losing our freezer and fridge items. We made some phone calls and found some homes for everything. Our fridge items went over to my dad's store into the one there. Our freezer items went over to my sister Erika's house and Ethan and I would go to my parent's house. We decided to eat lunch over at Matt's mom's house and we spent several hours there and then moved over to my parents. Ethan and I were going to stay the night if the lights were still out and Matt would go home and get some work done while he had nothing to distract him.

It all worked out well for all of us. It was weird sleeping in the house I had not slept overnight in since the night before our wedding. But, it was cool and we could both get some much needed sleep. At a little after midnight, Matt sent me a text message that said "THE LIGHTS ARE BACK". I was so happy and went to sleep even better than before. Matt picked us up after Ethan went to church with Grandpa and we started to get back to some normalcy. It really did teach us how much we rely on the computer, tv and electricity in general. It was so hard for me, because that has pretty much been my life lately. It was hard on our electrician son Ethan, because he had to tell us every light and tv that was broken and he was so excited when I told him everything was all fixed at breakfast this morning.

Who knew that when the clock struck midnight all of our plans for the weekend would completely change and on one of the hottest weekends!

20 weeks! and a good IEP meeting!

Well, I made it to a huge goal, which was 20 weeks! This has been a rough week emotionally as you saw in the last post. Ethan ended preschool today and this is also the last week of school for my students. I have never missed the end of the year, so it was difficult for me this week, but it is getting better as the week goes on.

20 weeks was a huge goal for me, because it is the halfway point of the pregnancy. Although it marks a very difficult part of the pregnancy, it gives me hope that I am on the downslope. I am now only 5 weeks from the week Ethan was born and then it will only be another 5 weeks until 30 weeks, which is where the doctor would like me to at least get to and hopefully further. I figure, I have been down for 6 weeks already, so I can make the next couple of chunks. I've already been down twice as long as I was for Ethan and that seemed like forever because I was in the hospital. This time, being home has made a huge difference in how fast the weeks go.

I have now been on progesterone for 30 days and had to pick up my refill today. That is another good thing, because that will help to keep my uterus calm in the next several weeks as the risks get higher. Every week I make is better for the baby, but it is also a higher risk of early labor. So, I am now in the point that I am counting every week and sometimes every day. Every week I get through, the happier I am and it combats the feeling of being scared.

One of the things that helps me through this is Ethan. Seeing him, gives me all the hope I need, especially when I have a meeting with his teachers like we did today. Matt and I went with Ethan to his IEP (Individualized Educational Plan) meeting (I can usually sit for about an hour and that is about how long it lasted). Ethan was so good during the meeting, he just went and played with some toys so that we could meet. We were told that Ethan had reached most of his IEP goals for this year. We were so happy to hear that.

We also found that we are seeing a different kid at home then they are seeing at school. He still has difficulties with his social skills and knowing how to play with other kids. He does well with his cousins, but given a situation where there are 12 kids in the room, he freezes up and needs a lot of adult intervention. He also has slow motor planning, which basically means that he has difficulties with taking messages in, processing it through his brain and then telling his body what to do. It could be talking, running, using his hands, basically anything his brain has to tell him to do. He has always had this problem, but it has improved greatly over the years and even they said that they have seen great improvements in this past year.

We came up with some pretty good goals for him for the next year and I believe he will make them or at least come really close to making them. He is an amazing kid and he loves to learn new things, so I know it will happen for him. We have him enrolled in a summer nature program, where he will have speech, occupational and physical therapist working with him once a week. He will also get more practice with social situations with a brand new set of kids. He will also go to our church VBS program in July. We are trying to expose him to several situations with new kids to help him with his social skills along with the situations to help with motor planning.

We will continue to work with him over the summer on some of the things we discussed at the meeting today, so that he will have a good transition back into school in September. We don't want to lose the momentum we have gained.

Like I said above, he gives me the hope I need everyday to keep this pregnancy safe :) This has already been an emotional but extremely good week! I look forward to my little goals that help me get through each week. My next goal is to get to the ultrasound next week to know that the baby is ok and hopefully, find out what we are having.

Maybe I'm just a little emotional but...

Was it wrong of me to burst into tears when Ethan came home today with his bookbag full of end of year stuff from preschool? I was going through his bag, as I do everyday, and we got to a bag that had a little book the teacher made. It started with a poem about how his teacher was returning him to us...I lost it...I cried. As we went through some of the things Ethan had drawn at different points through the year, I really saw how much he has grown over the past 9 months. (I find it symbolic that school lasts 9 months) We got to his class picture and he went through and told me all of his classmates' names. I looked at him and just cried more and just told him how proud I was that he worked so hard this year. Then he saw a tear stream down my face and said "what's that?". I told him "a tear, but it is a happy tear!" Then I smiled and hugged him.

I am so proud of him and all that he has done this year. This was all following a positive phone call from his teacher earlier today. She said that normally, they are lucky to get 1 or 2 words out of him at school and today it was like a light switch turned on. He was talking in full sentences and was going on and on about his weekend. I was so happy that I could barely contain myself. I called Matt right away and then I felt like I could not stop thinking about it, because I was so happy! He really does make me so proud to know that my tiny little miracle is doing so well and that he has accomplished so much in just 9 months. As much as the reality set in that my baby just finished his first year of preschool, I could not have been more proud of him than I was today. How will I make it through all of his other school milestones? I'm going to be a blubbering idiot :)

Perfect example of me being a blubbering idiot: I made a goodbye video for my students today and about halfway through I started crying as I do every year when I tell my students goodbye. I could have rewound the tape and started over, but that would not be the real me. They are not even my children, but they sort of become mine during the year and it is hard to say goodbye, even to the ones that challenged me, because they did just that, they made me a better teacher because of the challenge.

Mom and teacher, are they really different?? I don't think so.