A Crazy Week!

Well, I survived my first week back to work, but boy was it crazy! Getting into a new routine was a little difficult this week. It is certainly a switch to have to get all four of us ready in a two hour span of time. We seemed to hit a good groove that allowed all of us enough time, but we still need to work on making it a little smoother. I'm sure that will come with time. I'm not getting out as early as I would like, but I am still getting to work on time. It would be nice to start getting there about 15 minutes early, so that I don't have to stay after school very long.

Thankfully, we have a pretty good group of students this year, so that part wasn't so bad. The kids tried to push a few buttons, but soon realized that it wouldn't work! The part that was hard was getting back into my classroom, which has been run by someone else for the last 9 months. I didn't get to close my classroom at the end of last year, so the sub I had then is the one that did that. Then I didn't get to open the room this year, so a different sub did that and then stayed until I came back. So, after two different people were in my room, it has taken me some time to reorient myself to my classroom. It hasn't been too bad, but it has been weird at times :) It's my stuff, yet I don't know where all of it is at times. I'm slowly but surely finding my way back into my classroom and getting things organized the way I want them. Most things were pretty much done the way I would do them, since my sub and I did talk quite a bit about how to run lessons and such. It is just the little things that are taking more time for me to get used to. It doesn't help that there have been a lot of changes in the building itself this year. But, overall the week went well.

I had a snow day thrown into the middle of the week, which was helpful for me in terms of lesson planning and getting a little further ahead on that. My body seems to be holding up for the most part. I have had a lot of foot pain and some back pain, but I am finding some things that help a little. I bought a pair of black tennis shoes to wear with my dress pants and that helps a lot. I've also starting sleeping with my body pillow again to help my back. I am waking up in a little less pain each morning now. Some of the things I have read recently have said that it could take up to a year before I feel more like myself physically!! I really don't think I can deal with this pain for that long. I'm hoping that if I can lose some of my weight that will help, especially because I'll be exercising and stretching out all of those tight muscles. Matt got me a gift card for a massage, so I'm going to set one up one of these weekends, so that may help a bit too.

On top of me going to work, our kids have been sick. Micah started to get a runny nose and has been a little stuffy at times. Overall, he is handling it well and is really not that sick from it, just a little irritable at times. Ethan did well all week until Thursday night. I took my mom to dinner with the boys and when Ethan's food came, he looked at it, made a disgusted face and turned to me and said "I don't feel good Mama." They were the words I dreaded all week! It turns out that 3 of my nephews and one niece got sick early this week, right after all of them had been playing together at my other nephew's b-day party. Then after Micah got his little cold, I just prayed that Ethan wouldn't get it.

After we got home on Thursday, Ethan ended up with a fever. The next worry is that he would need his albuterol aerosol treatments. He made it all day on Friday until we got home that night before he needed one. Then that led into a night of more treatments and fevers. All day today has also been more fevers and treatments. It is just never good when he gets sick! It seems as though he can never just get a cold. So, we just do what we need to do in order to get him through it as best as possible. Matt is exhausted, because he was up most of the time on Friday night with Ethan. Hopefully, he doesn't also end up sick.

One interesting thing we noticed this week, is that Micah will probably be an early sitter! He has been practically pulling himself to sit up when he is in a semi-reclined position. We have also both tried sitting him up and he will sit for a few seconds without assistance! We have been amazed by him. He really is happiest when he is sitting up somewhere. Micah just loves looking around at what is happening around him. He also started to give a really good belly laugh this week. If you have him paying attention to you, it is possible to get him in a really good laugh, which has been such a blast. I tried to record it, but it was like he knew what I was doing and would stop laughing, then start again when I put the camera down! What a little stinker! I do have a few new pictures that I will try to post soon. Probably in the next couple of days. I just have to get them put onto the computer :)

I hope you all have a good week and I'll post those pics soon.

Back to the Grind...

Yes, I finally went back to work today! It has been exactly 9 months since the last time I had worked, so it was a little surreal at times. The morning went ok with getting Ethan, Micah and I all ready to go. I even got out of the house with enough time to drop them off at my mom's and still get to work at 8!

Once at school, I was in meetings until 11:30. It was really hard for the first hour, because I had cried after dropping off the kids and those emotions took some time to ease up. I was pretty emotional and in somewhat of a daze for that first hour, but then after that things started to get better because I was kept so busy.

I finally got to sit down with my sub and go over routines and student info. It was funny because she and I talked about how she had to recap 5 months of stuff in one day and I had to try and retain 5 months of stuff in one day! I'm feeling a little overwhelmed at the moment, because there was just so much information. I think that as I process all of it over the weekend and sort it out in my mind, things will feel better. On Monday, I will have the students for the first time. I'm hoping to get there early, so that I can just prepare for having students, since today was all about getting to know my classroom routines and such.

Overall, things went well and I made it through the day and in less than 5 months, I will be back home with the boys for the summer, which will be really nice. It's a busy semester for my grade, so that will also help with things going quickly for me...at least I hope :)

In other news...I am getting new glasses tomorrow and I'm really excited about it. Matt and I went last week to pick some out, so I get to pick them up tomorrow. I've been waiting 3 years for this! When I got this pair, it was with the intention that I would be wearing contacts most of the time. In then end, I ended up not being able to wear contacts and I had this cheap pair of glasses. I finally got the chance to go and get an eye appointment so that I could get new ones and I'm so excited about it.

I took Ethan to the pulmonary doctor on Wed and all is good. The doctor said that he was the best patient he had all day. Then he looked at me and said, "no really, he is the best patient we had all day, I really mean this." Ethan did great and they told us that he is going to move up in the administration of his medicine in April. Since he will be 5 this summer, he is old enough to move away from the nebulizer and use the spacer (I think that is what it is called). It will be so nice to not have to spend 20 minutes every couple of hours doing treatments when he is really sick. It will also be nice to not have to carry around that nebulizer everytime we go out of town, even if it is an hour. After using it for almost 4 years, we will be happy to be rid of it. Now our next step is getting him to the point where he may not need any of the meds. Hopefully, he will grow out of his asthma at some point, but if he doesn't at least we know things get easier to manage the older he gets.

Next week will be a big week of changes as we try to adjust to the new schedule, so wish us luck :)

Daily Battle of the Brains

While I was on bedrest, I joined a trivia tournament that several staff members at my school play online. I had so much fun with that and decided I knew a lot of people that would enjoy playing some trivia. So, I started up a tournament for our family and friends. We have a pretty good group of people playing and would love to have some more challengers! I've put a link to our tournament on the right-hand side of the blog. Also, if you do join us, you will receive an email confirming that you have joined. Then, you may also get some emails with trivia questions. That is not the same trivia as the one that we are playing. You have to actually go to the website with our trivia each day to play with the rest of us. That way you will get ranked with the rest of us on our page. Save it in your favorites and join us each day for some friendly competition :) We hope to see you there!

S"no"w Fun

Those of us that don't live in sunny San Diego (Matt's dad and brothers live there, along with some step-family) have had to deal with this lovely Ohio winter weather. Don't get me wrong, I love a good snow, but I love it for about a day and then it can go away. Last weekend, we got blasted with somewhere around 8-10 inches of snow. As the week went on we put on another 4 or so inches. Now we are dealing with below zero temperatures. This morning, I turned on the news and I could not believe what I saw at 9 am. The actual temperature was -11 and the temperature with the wind chill factored in was -32!!!!! I was in shock that it could actually be that cold. No wonder every school in the area was closed!

Like I said, I don't mind a good snow, especially if I don't have to be in it. I love the morning after a snowy night. It is so quiet and still outside. On Sunday morning, we woke to a very messy road. We live on a busy enough road to be cleaned, but it was clearly not clean, because it was Sunday. It was such a beautiful morning and truly of God's work. I woke to find it foggy outside and everything was covered in snow. I opened the door and stepped outside to take some pictures and some video. All I could hear was the train that is about a mile away and the birds singing in the trees. Every once in awhile a car would come down the road, but overall it was very quiet. That is when I love snow!

Another reason I love snow is to watch Ethan go out in the snow. He has so much fun trying to walk through it. This year, Santa brought him some nice snow mittens so that he could actually play in the snow. I also love watching Maggie run and play in the snow. She loves to dig her face into the snow. Being that she is all black, the white snow looks really cool on her. I also love to see the icicles that form. We had some really big ones that were hanging at both our front and back doors. Those are just some of the things that I do love about winter.

The cold air on the other hand is not my favorite thing. I really don't like going out in the cold. So, to even open the door to let Maggie out is really hard to do! As much as I like to see the snow, I'm pretty much over it once the plows go through and the dog has trampled it. After that, I love to see it melt away :) Of course, there is no chance of that for quite some time around here. The temps we have had for the past few days have pretty much made the snow pretty thick and hard and on top of that, we are supposed to get another several inches of snow this weekend. Ahhhh....the joys of winter! Maybe we'll actually be able to take Ethan sledding in his new sled, which will make all of the yucky snow, so much better :) Of course we need temperatures to be a little higher and not cause frost bite during our first ride down the hill!!

Anyway, here are some recent pictures of our fun in the snow...

Foggy, Snowy, Sunday morning, looking down our road. On the right-hand side you can see the pine tree that the rolled-over truck destroyed in December. That hole is where the truck was sitting upside-down.

I just thought the fog here looked cool. Icicles outside our back door.Can we say Randy from "Christmas Story"?
Yes, he went down his slide and even swung on his swings!!

Look at Maggie's snowy face.

3 Months Old

Micah turned 3 months old on Tuesday! I can't believe he is already that old and that it has been that long. He had his well-baby check that day also and everything looks great. He weighs 15 lbs and is 24 1/4 inches long. The doctor said that he went from the 50th percentile last month to the 90th this month for his weight! He put on nearly 3 lbs in a month, he is just growing like a weed. My plan for today is to pack up all of the 0-3 month clothes already and pull out the 3-6 month clothes. The doctor said he looks very healthy and strong, and that makes me so happy. Micah is babbling away and that has been so much fun to listen to. He sits really well when propped. Yesterday, he was in his bumbo seat and Ethan was dancing and singing around him. Micah followed Ethan around and turned his head so well. I was so amazed at how well he did. He loves to sit up, whether he is on our laps or we prop him up, he wants to look at everything. He also likes to stand up. Micah is just growing before our eyes! Here are some pictures and some video of his babbling :) I just love his expressions while he is talking. The darker portion of the video was taken while he was in his bed. We have a mirror with some animals hanging from it that is hung above his bed and he is talking to those little animals. His little voice is so sweet.

Micah "talking" 1/15/09

Bed Rest Left Overs

I knew the moment I was put on bed rest so early that it would end up affecting me for a long time. I just didn't realize how difficult some of the things would be. I knew that my muscles would end up taking the toll, but I never thought about how hard it would be to deal with it afterwards.

Every morning, when I wake up and step out of bed, it feels as though I am walking on glass. There is so much pain in my feet and ankles, because my tendons are so tight. It even happens if I sit down for 10 or more minutes. So, basically every time I get up after sitting, I am in pain for awhile. After being up and about it seems to go away, because it is being stretched out. I am working on some stretches to get that worked out, but even that has been painful.

My back is another thing that has taken a toll. My sciadic is so bad that it can be painful for me to even roll over in bed at times. Unfortunately, because of being stuck on mostly my left during the pregnancy, my sciadic literally locks my back and leg in place and if I try to move it sends a horrendous pain through my back and leg. So, rolling over must be done very carefully. Walking can cause a lot of problems also, as I can get shooting pains from my sciadic, which is really annoying.

My weight has also been a major issue. I know that the pains in my feet and back are compounded by the fact that I put on about 50 lbs during the pregnancy and have only lost about 15-20 of it when Micah was born. My weight is affecting my knees also, which I think is leading into some of the foot problem. One thing I have learned about all of this is that one thing leads to another. The weight is putting pressure on my knees, which puts pressure on my feet. My back being screwed up, is causing me not to walk correctly, which is causing problems with my knees and my feet. It is rather frustrating, but at least I know what is causing all of my problems.

I also have some problems with my right hand...ok that is because I spent months on my laptop. I would literally spend hours playing games, because I was on my side so much and games were easy to play with one hand. So, part of that was because I was so bored and needed something to do, but I guess it could have been better prevented. Oh well...

For Christmas, Matt and I got a Wii and Wii Fit. He got a good deal the day after Thanksgiving, so we've had it for almost 2 months now. If you don't have the Wii Fit, I'll give you a little explanation of what it is. Basically, you get on and you can do a body test that weighs you and gives you your BMI. Then you can do a balance test, which will then give you your Wii Fit age. Your little character gains and loses weight as you do. There are strength training exercises, aerobics, yoga and balance games. So, you can set up a good workout for yourself.

In the last two months, we have been getting to know our Wii Fit and in the past week I have been trying to actually spend 30-45 minutes working out with the exercises each day. When you do the yoga or strength training exercises, it records the amount of pressure you put on each foot, your balance and your center of balance. In several of the exercises it has mentioned that my right side is very tight and not strong. It totally makes sense as I spent most of my time on my left side, which caused my right side to have issues because it was pulled and twisted in weird ways.

I have found that the exercises are really helping me to loosen up, which has been much better. I'm hoping that after some more time, some of the daily aches and pain will start to go away. I'm also hoping to see that BMI and weight continue to go down. So far, it has gone up and down in a bit of a roller coaster. I think I will see a difference now that I am trying to work out regularly. I have to get a schedule down, since I will be staring back at work next Friday. It will be a challenge to be standing for the majority of the day. I'm really not looking forward to what will happen to my back, knees and feet. Standing will help to strengthen me over time, so that would be good, but I know it will be pretty painful and exhausting for the first few weeks.

Wish me the best as I begin a new process. I really need to focus on this, because this is an area that I have always had difficulties in the past. I can work out well enough, but I have a hard time getting the diet right. I usually start out good and then slowly fall off, so this time I need to stay straight on this path. I am going to set myself up to update once in awhile as a motivator to keep me going. So, you'll have to hold me to it and encourage me :) I need it!!

Are Dad's Really Useless??

***WARNING...I am going to rant and rave and these are just my thoughts!***

I am so tired of people, literature, t.v. shows, etc. putting Dad's in such a horrible light. I know it may sound funny coming from a woman and a mom, but this frustrates me. Here is what threw me over the edge on this topic...

I received a small magazine from Enfamil in the mail today. It's about 20 pages and has little paragraph sized articles in it. One of the titles was "Make Room for Daddy". So, I read it, as I did with the others. The first two lines are what got me...

Want to get in on a little secret about the daddy-baby bond? Well, you can start by putting Dad on diaper duty.

Then it goes on to say...The more Dad is involved in day-to-day caregiving tasks, the stronger the bond will be...take the night-feeding shift, stroll with the baby in a carrier, or just enjoy playtime.

WHAT?????????

Is it really necessary to have an article tell a mom what to have the dad do? Are there really that many dads that take no part in the caregiving? Am I on an island all to myself that I have a husband that shares equally in the parenting duties? I mean really, does a mom need to be told to make sure her husband plays with the baby so that they can bond?

Since when did babies only bond with their mothers? I am so sick of this whole bonding thing and what it has been made to be about. In the past couple of years since becoming a mom, it has been made very clear that apparently the only way a mother can possibly bond with her child is through breastfeeding, which means that dads can't possibly bond with their child. I really don't believe this theory and this is why...

With Ethan, I could not breast feed, it was not possible with his developmental delays and prematurity. So, according to this theory, I didn't get to bond with him. But, wait, what about me going to the hospital for 88 days and sitting for hours just holding his little fingers through the isolette holes? What about the days that I sat holding a book with one hand and holding his tiny little hand with the other hand while I read to him? What about all the times that once I could hold him, that I sat for hours holding him in my arms and singing to him or telling him about his family and all of the people waiting for him? That just covers me...What about all of the evenings and weekends that Matt spent at the hospital with Ethan doing all of the things I did during the day for that same 88 days? This doesn't even include every single diaper we each changed, the baths we each gave and all of the temperatures we took.

I could not hold my baby for almost 2 weeks after he was born, so does that mean that we didn't bond? NO!!! Ethan and I have an amazing relationship and so do Matt and Ethan. With Micah we did not have the same kinds of things happen, but I again was unable to breast feed him after the first week and that did not stop me from feeling a bond with my baby. I bond with him every single day in every moment I spend with him. I have my own special moments with him and so does Matt. When Matt comes home, he takes time to spend with Micah and Ethan. I don't have a useless husband and father to my children.

We have both always fed, changed, rocked, stayed up with, sung to, danced with and loved our children. Why are dads made out to be these guys that live in the house and take no part in their children's lives? Just look at how dads are portrayed on t.v. and in the movies. Is this why they need to write articles about how a dad can bond with their child? Are dads this dumb??

I have been criticized for not getting up in the middle of the night every time Ethan calls out. You know why? It's because Matt and I both get up. When Ethan is sick, we take turns getting up with him. One of the most recent times, Matt got up with Ethan, while I took the night feedings with Micah. Why should one parent be run down, because the other one is supposed to be dumb when it comes to taking care of the kids?

Matt and I share our parenting duties completely and that means that yes, Matt changes just as many diapers as me and feeds Micah as many times as I do. Even Matt gets offended by the way fathers are portrayed, because that is not at all how he is. I love that my husband is such a caring and loving father and I would never trade the relationship we have with each other and with our children.

To all those dads in the world that seem to be morons when it comes to taking care of their children "Don't forget to spend time with your children!" Or, maybe just stop playing dumb and take your job as dad seriously!

A Little Dose of Reality...

My baby will be going to Kindergarten later this year!!! I can't even believe it. Today, Ethan brought home his weekly preschool newsletter and I had a dose of reality. The newsletters give information about all of the things they will be doing during the week in all areas. It also gives important dates and events coming up in the weeks ahead. That's where I saw it...on Jan 30, there will be a meeting for all students entering Kindergarten in the Fall of 2009!!

It really made me stop and realize that Ethan turns 5 this summer and is one of those students starting Kindergarten this year! I am so amazed that he is going to be a full-time elementary school student in 9 months! This is crazy, but exciting all at the same time. Sometimes, I wish he and Micah would just stay the ages they are, but I also look forward to watching them become men.

Saturday, Matt and I decided to go out to lunch with the kids. We had some gift cards for Friday's, so we thought we would use them. When we sat down, we were seated right next to another family of four. They also had 2 boys, who were maybe 11 and 13. It made me think about the fact someday, that will be us sitting at the table with our preteen boys :)

Reality sunk in that our little boys won't stay little forever and the notice about that meeting really sealed it in my mind! I'm still in shock, but I am so proud of Ethan and all that he has accomplished in the last 4 1/2 years! I know that Micah will make me as proud, he's already started with the little things he has accomplished!

Happy 2009!

It really hit me yesterday how much can change in just one year. I seemed to be in complete shock that a whole year had gone by when January of last year seemed so fresh in my mind. Micah was just a thought we had, we knew we wanted to try for a baby and by the end of January I was pregnant. Now I look at this beautiful, healthy baby boy that I have and I am amazed as to how much has changed.

Not only have we added a new member to our family, but we have learned to live our lives with a new appreciation. When I was put on bedrest much earlier than expected, it gave us the opportunity to accept support and help from so many people. People we didn't even really know well were giving us support through prayers, emails, and meals. Our families gave us support through all of those things plus giving me rides to my many doctor's appointments, taking care of Ethan whenever we needed it, and giving Matt help and support when he needed it. Learning to accept any and all help was humbling. It was not easy to do it, because normally we just do things on our own. Having had that experience, I have learned to accept help and I now know that people don't help because they have to, it is because they want to. It has made me want to be more giving and help others "just because". So, one of the things I want to plan on doing in 2009 is to give back in many different ways. I already have so many ideas of how I want to honor those that helped me. One thing I want to do is to give to my church food pantry. I was given food by so many people at my church that I want to give back by donating food to the food pantry. I will also get on the list for making meals for those in need at our church. I also want to make things for the babies and children at the hospital, both the NICU and the children's hospital. All of the people that supported us, helped Micah to not need to be in the NICU, so I want to make some blankets, hats and donate other things to help honor that. I also hope to include the Ronald McDonald House this year.

I have also appreciated all that we went through with Ethan. Last year at this time, I was so scared about the thought of getting pregnant because of what happened with Ethan. Now, I appreciate the difficulties we went through with Ethan, because it has made me appreciate him even more! It really shows me how special he really is now that I have a full-term baby. You can't truly appreciate every single little milestone until you have had to struggle to get to each milestone. One example was getting Ethan to look and make eye contact with someone or something. I remember how much I had to do to get him to do that and right now I am watching Micah staring at his little cow that is hanging above him and he is smiling at it. That makes me smile and brings tears of joy to my eyes. I would have never known the importance of that milestone, had I not gone through what I did with Ethan. I remember that 4 years ago, we had just been told that Ethan had a severe hearing loss and I remember how scared I was for him. Knowing the struggle we had with every hearing test waiting for his hearing to improve over the next 2 1/2 years, has made me appreciate every time Micah turns his head at a sound or to his name. I would have never known how to appreciate those things without Ethan. So, in 2009 I plan to continue to encourage Ethan and show him my appreciation that he is in my life. This is nothing new, it is only heightened because of what I went through this year.

Physically, I have gone through a lot of changes. I was diagnosed with sleep apnea last March and I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes last August. I was on bedrest for 6 months which has changed my body drastically from the chest down! Not only did I gain nearly 50 lbs (luckily about 20 lbs went away after Micah was born), but I have also lost a lot of muscle in my legs and feet, and I have added more back problems. So, with so many physical changes in one year, I have decided that I HAVE to make changes in 2009. I have 2 children that need me to be able to run and play with them and who need me to be alive for them. Because of the sleep apnea, I am at risk of a lot of other problems with my heart and kidneys. Because of the gestational diabetes I will always be at a higher risk of getting type 2 diabetes someday. In order to lessen my risks, I HAVE to lose all of the extra weight I gained, plus another 30lbs or so. In order to gain back strength in my legs, feet and back, I HAVE to exercise regularly. So, in 2009, I plan to work hard at getting into a good workout routine and eating healthier. I have about 60lbs to lose in order to be at a healthy weight. I don't expect to lose it all this year, but I'd like to get a big chunk of it gone and as close to all of it that I can get.

As difficult as this past year was at times, it has opened my eyes to so many things. You'll notice that I didn't say that I was resolving to do any of these things. I never really make resolutions, because when I have, I have not taken them seriously. Instead, I am making changes for 2009 and for the years to come. I am starting these things this year, but plan to continue them every year. I know that the biggest one for me will be my health and getting myself into a better situation. It will be the hardest for me and the one that I will need the most support on. It is too easy for me to say I'm too tired to work out or that I'm too hungry to diet, so I need to be pushed to continue to work hard. Hopefully, I will be able to set small goals for myself and make it easier to reach my goals for my weight loss and exercise.

I wish all of you the best for 2009 and I thank you all for being a part of our lives! Here are a few pictures from Christmas!

This was Christmas morning, the sled was filled with all of the gifts from Santa for Ethan. It even included the one thing he asked Santa for, Clipo! He was so impressed that Santa ate his cookie and drank all of his milk!

This was the biggest gift that Micah got, grandma Young got him a Bumbo! He even had a slight smile for the picture. He can only be in it right now for just a few minutes, but it will be a great thing for him in the coming months. He really likes the few minutes he gets, because he loves sitting up!

This was taken Christmas day at my sister's house. These are the 11 grandchildren in my family! That's right, 8 boys and only 3 girls!